Absolutely nothing is going on in my head

The Wooing of The Call

So I went on this long journey that kept me away from my interest and dreams. I have spent about 10months away from writing, speaking, blogging, singing, real country cooking and designing. I had lost interest in the most simplest things. I went on this journey not by choice but time and life's issues overshadowed my very sense of self and I completely lost that which made me, ME. I was losing myself in bits, daily, to the perils of this so called existence; to responsibilities, adulthood, to life. The Vivian I once knew ran, leaping away from everything that defined who I really was. I remembered days when going to church and playing drums was fun, when staying up late, cleaning and decorating the sanctuary was my oasis. I remember the percolating smell of trying out new gourmet recipes from the food network and how that thrilled me. I also remember using my God given hands to design clothes, make gel candles that last for years. I remember my voice, the sound of it, the use of it, I remember the day the resounding of my voice broke a bulb in church. I remember using my mind to create, and my fingers wrote passionate poems and how writing was my life. I remember inspiration, the tingle I feel when I write something new. I remember the ideas, the dreams, the sense of ownership, the certainty of greatness, the knowing of who I am, and who was called to be. Now only the shadows exist, the thoughts of who I once was, but the knowing that somehow shes not too far gone. Yea, life did happen, principles did somehow change, did things I never thought I could do, but I do believe in a new day, a new start, a new Genesis. I do believe that all those things will come back once inspiration finds me again. I am on a different journey now, it just started today. This is my first writing in 10months, I am now pregnant with words, with stories yearning to be told, with ideas borne out of adversity, with a new sense of self. My conflicted soul is now finding rest, who I once was and who I am now makes a beautiful story, teaches a great lesson. I am ready to come alive, I am ready to bask in the wooing of the call.

Giving Less and Expecting More

Maybe its just me but I am getting tired of feeling like men don't put too much work into getting a woman this days. A guy in the 21st century takes you to the movies and maybe to Red Lobster and expects for you to put out, by the end of the date. He doesn't buy you flowers, doesn't open the doors, doesn't pick you up at your apartment. Back in the days men use to pick a woman up from home, probably gets permission from her parents before taking her out, buys her flowers, takes her out and doesn't expect a kiss until several dates after. Men this days have no patience to wait for a kiss, needless to say sex; by the second date if you are still keeping your legs closed he probably won't call you again. Times have changed. Men are no longer into preserving a woman's honor, and we women have somehow sold ourselves short. We don't even expect much from men anymore, just mediocrity in the quest to become Mrs. SO and SO. Think about it!!!

LOSING WEIGHT

I have been on this so called protein diet for about three days now. I have lost 5pounds so far with no exercise, I can hardly move though because I am so tired all the time. I found out that eating protein has helped me rest more; I sleep like a baby being on this diet. My goal is to lose 50pounds before the year ends so I hope I can stay away from bread and my favorite SUSHI.

Vivianspeaks

Google in Yoruba

You can Google in Yoruba thats so cool http://www.google.com/intl/yo/